What Not to Wear- The Shoe of Comparison

Shoe of Comparison

This morning I made a drastic decision. I took down my full-length mirror! 

Last night I kept hearing a clicking noise in the bathroom, and I couldn’t figure out what it was. First, I thought it was a grasshopper hopping around, then thought maybe it was a mouse.  Or a squirrel trying to find a warm place in my house!

These are the things I think about at 3am in the morning when my pilot is on a trip!   

Do you ever have moments like this?

Later that morning as I got dressed, I heard the sound again and discovered that it only made that sound when the heat came on. Puzzled, I stood there trying to figure out what the heck was going on!

The air vent is located where it will hit the back of our bathroom door where the mirror is.

After a few minutes of research, I realized that the noise was a result of the air vent hitting the back of the bathroom door where my bathroom mirror hangs.  Apparently, the sticky tape that holds the mirror to the door had become loose so that when the air hit the mirror, it created my mystery noise.

So what did I do? I took the stupid mirror down, sticky tape and all!

Traveling with an over-the-limit bag of doubt

It wasn’t a big deal for me to remove the mirror from the door.  The creepy noise wasn’t the only reason I took it down.

When I look in a mirror, I find faults. 

I don’t always find faults in my reflection; there are days where I like what I see. I feel confident and ready to step into what I have planned for the day.  The majority of the time I don’t even think about flying over to the comparison town of inadequacy.

Lately, though, I’ve found that playing the comparison game weighs heavily upon me, and the doubts and negativity that I pack in my bag becomes too much.  In fact, the last few months I have found myself with my suitcase packed with a wide range of emotions:

1.  Jealousy that “her” house is much more beautiful than mine (which I know is absolute nonsense).

2. Failure, in that “she” takes the time to learn how to set up her husband’s schedule and I don’t (I have no clue on how to do that, and quite frankly, have no desire to).

3.  Not up to par, in that, I’m obviously the PW without an espresso machine (seriously).

Side note: I love my friends. I love their homes. I love their espresso machines.  I love that my friends know how to make their husbands’ schedules work for their families. It’s awesome!  ( It has impressed my husband that I have become knowledgeable in those areas).

Although I have battled these comparison emotions many times before, perhaps my biggest struggle comes on a much deeper level.  You see, I recently gained a few pounds and compared to everyone else I feel like I’m not pretty and nothing fits, while everyone else looks awesome!  Which, if I’m honest, makes me feel unattractive to my husband.

I could go on, but you get the point.

It’s real, girlfriend!

Comparison was not on my radar

The majority of the time I have no desire to play the comparison game. I’m blessed with many things: I have a beautiful home, an awesome husband who regularly reminds me that I’m beautiful and great friends to spend time and delicious lattes with!

So why do I even pack for that trip?

  In  her book,  Becoming More than a Good Bible Study Girl,” Lysa Terkerust says, “Whenever I get an overly idyllic view of someones else’s circumstances, I often remind myself out loud, ” I am not equipped to handle what they have both good and bad.” She goes on to say, “The things for the person I’m comparing myself to are almost never what they seem.”

How many times do you and I tell ourselves “I wish I had what she had?” I know I do.

As I fly into a New Year, my goal is to repack my thoughts of comparison, jealousy, and guilt. They can weigh down my bag and cause me to feel exhausted and weak in my thinking.

I don’t  want that for my year, or my life.

I want a bag like yours – or do I?

When I find myself traveling into those mindsets and putting those unfashionable ugly shoes into my bag, I need to remember that God is the one who makes me content.

That’s why I love this verse from the Bible, “Make a careful exploration of who you are and the work you have been given and then sink yourself into that. Don’t be impressed with yourself. Don’t compare yourself with others. Each of you must take responsibility for doing the creative best you can with your own life.” ( Galatians 6:4-5, MSG)

comparrison shoe

When I become jealous of the shoes someone else is wearing ( I.e., her life), maybe I need to remind myself that something is leading me to think that way.

If I  believe that her style is better than mine, that her home is perfectly decorated, I might want to consider that it’s not that I want to take all that away from her. It may be because I have the desire to feel appreciated by others as she is at that moment.

Yet I need to remember that God has a beautiful plan for me.  A life, and a shoe, that is designed just for me to wear and to accomplish things in my own life. Perhaps what I should be doing instead is praying that God helps me find contentment with the basic needs He has provided me.

With that in mind, my goal this year is to try not to compare my shoes to another PW, or anyone, for that matter. I want to walk in the shoes that He has for me and wear them with confidence!

When I do, I can remind myself that I’m not “her.”   Because the truth is, we all have different taste in shoes from functionality to dressing up.  In the end, we find we all have one thing in common- we all put on one shoe at a time.

My prayer for you this week:  Father, help each of us to walk with confidence, strength, and wisdom that we are beautiful.  Help us to remember that You have equipped us with everything that we need to live the life You have given us, from the shoe we wear to the way we decorate our house.  Help us not play the comparison game with other Pilot Wives.  Instead let us remember that compares with You, and to be content with that.

Take off and Landings Always,Tiffany

Love for you to fly over to The Takeoff and Landings Facebook page. Where we can talk and encourage each other while living this life.

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